


66. A drunken announcement

by alley_oops, jennandanica



Series: Citadel: Sam Worthington and Ryan Kwanten [66]
Category: Actor RPF, Australian Actor RPF, Citadel (Journalfen RPG), True Blood RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-11-03
Updated: 2008-11-03
Packaged: 2018-01-15 08:26:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1298125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alley_oops/pseuds/alley_oops, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jennandanica/pseuds/jennandanica





	66. A drunken announcement

  


| ! Ryan Christian Kwanten ([](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/profile)[ **kwanten**](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/) ) wrote,  
@ [2011](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/2011/)-[04](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/2011/04/)-[19](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/2011/04/19/) 22:57:00   
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**Current mood:** |  drunk  
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_**oops: Ryan Kwanten accidentally makes a drunken public announcement**_  
[current; meant to be private-locked; accidentally locked to all of Citadel]  
[ **EDIT:** now locked down private]  
  
He owns me. He so copmletely fucking owns me. Not just in terms of 'yes Sam whatever you want Sam' - not service. But he owns me down to my core. And theat scares teh fuck out of me. Because there's such a huge level of need there, so much need to put on any one person. THat's a cruel burden. I don't want to terrify him and make him run screaming away from me, away from how much I _need_ him, like with my entire viscera. If he's a normal person then that will be too much for him. I's not clean and tidy and easy to devide up  by calandeer days, how much need per day, so no one day gets overwhelmed. It's all of me, all of the time. needing him. And I'm scared no terrified to tell him that I feel this way because he's already made such huge commitmments for me, and theis can't be one he was coutning on.   
  
So I'm locking it up tight. No one needs to know. I'll keep it inside and when it needs to burst out I'll find some controlled avenue for bursting.

  


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**([Post a new comment](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/16034.html?mode=reply))**

|  ****  
[](http://www.journalfen.net/users/jleto/profile)[**jleto**](http://www.journalfen.net/users/jleto/)  
2011-04-20 12:15 pm UTC ([link](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/16034.html?thread=5538#t5538))   
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Hey dude, zipper check, man. Think you messed up your lock.  
  
That said . . . I'm just a normal person who is needed like that. It's heavy, but it's not a burden. I don't know "him" and I don't know your relationship, so it might be different for him. Don't sell yourself short, though. Being needed can be one of the best feelings in the world, even when--especially when--it's that intense. And if he's got dominant blood? Yeah, it's a buzz. 

([Reply to this](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/16034.html?replyto=5538))  
  
|  ****  
[](http://www.journalfen.net/users/poolboys_dream/profile)[**poolboys_dream**](http://www.journalfen.net/users/poolboys_dream/)  
2011-04-20 01:15 pm UTC ([link](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/16034.html?thread=5794#t5794))   
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You accidentally made this public, man.  
  
Not that I know much about this sort of thing, but your guy might not have a problem with how you're feeling. One thing I do know about is repression. If you keep something that intense hidden away, it's going to eat at you and end badly. 

([Reply to this](http://www.journalfen.net/users/kwanten/16034.html?replyto=5794))  
  
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